Awareness and Child Safety (return to)

Signals of Distress

Not all children are able to tell their parents they have been abused so it is important to be aware of signs your child may exhibit. Changes in behaviour may be signals that something has happened. In spite of all your effort to assure your children you want them to tell you about any incident that they find to be frightening or unsettling, they still may not do so. Children often feel responsible and blame themselves for what happened, or are told by the offender that if they tell anyone they will get into trouble. Therefore, children will not want anyone to find out for fear of being punished. Children harboring such guilt often manifest it in ways which seem to have little to do with sexual abuse. Be alert to this possibility if you observe any of the following:

• Clear or vague references to being touched in a manner the child is not accustomed to or comfortable with;
• Sudden changes in behaviour, i.e. withdrawal or depression, which does not seem to have a specific cause, loss of appetite, poor attendance at school, or a desire to change schools, lack of interest in usual recreational activities, or sudden avoidance of a parent, relative or family friend;
• Unexplained bruises or scratches;
• Physical symptoms such as nausea, vomiting or bedwetting;
• Fear of being left alone or being left with a particular person or at places which remind them of the assault;
• Sexualized behaviour inappropriate for the age of the child;
• Insomnia and nightmares.

In adolescence, reactions to sexual abuse or sexual assault might include: truancy, alcohol or drug abuse, promiscuity, prostitution, self-mutilation, eating disorders, suicidal thoughts or running away from home.

Any of these symptoms alone may be an indicator something is wrong, but not necessarily sexual abuse. Watch for (1) clusters of behaviour, (2) patterns over time or (3) sudden changes in the child's behaviour.

Personal Safety